Couldn’t Help It

Normally I just put stuff out there and let it go but I couldn't help but say a couple of more things. I don't believe that being 'a loner' in and of itself is a bad thing. I might have given that impression. It is what it is and there is nothing wrong with it as long as it does not isolate you to the point where you are lonely or otherwise negatively affected.

My thing is when I am alone too much I worry. The idle mind is indeed the playground of my devil and I try not to let my weaknesses lead me. Alone is cool as long as it is an option not a prison.

This is for the young lady who said she's a little afraid of strangers and doesn't dance or drink so doesn't quite know what to do. I feel you on the stranger anxiety but I've been working that on a PIP for a long time because that has put limits on me. It used to tell me what I could and could not do. It kept me from being a bridesmaid in my own best friends wedding.

So I had to change and I worked it like a job. I watched others who know how to work a room or are comfortable in strange situations and I imitated them. I faked it until I felt it.

AND also remember this partying is not the only form of social interaction. If you want to enjoy others you can start by finding THINGS you like to do. Take a class, volunteer, join a book club - whatever. You will meet people who share your interests and you don't have to start some artificial conversation. You talk about what you are doing. That is a good way to get out there and get connected. No booze or boogeying involved!

Last, the reason I felt the need to say one more thing about this is because I think that too much virtual and not enough actual can be a bad thing. We are social creatures and there is a real biochemical benefit to social interaction. It helps with empathy and stress reduction. Just like anything else, virtual socialization is a good thing as long as its not taken too far.

For what it's worth.